the second plague

at first it was cute. a few weeks back, our roommate told us a story about how she found a frog in her bedroom at 4 in the morning. (well, full disclosure, i first saw the news at the source of where i get all of my information, facebook). i thought it was hilarious…a frog?? how did it get upstairs?? we marveled at the little elusive frog that was able to hop hop hop away from her clutches for a full 90 minutes before she caught it. during the great chase she wrangled it into her bathroom and thought maybe it could find a home in her tub until morning…but all she could think about was it hopping onto her toothbrush. yup, that’s gross. her other plan was to knock on our door and ask saagar if he wanted to go surfing (you need a reason to get that one out of bed). she pictured the sleepy conversation going something like this:

*knock knock* “hey saagar, want to go surfing?”

“surfing? it’s pouring out.”

“oh, i totally didn’t notice. well, while you’re up, want to catch this frog that’s in my room?”

she finally did catch it and that was the end of it.

until there were more.

even all-knowing f'book doesn't have the answer

we would find little frogs hopping about in the living room downstairs and the roommate found more uninvited houseguests in her room. not by the dozens or anything…but enough to make us really look and wonder about the froggy source. we ran into our landlord at the cinema – were they coming from the toilets? god, i HOPE not, i thought…and it made me picture something out of a kids’ picture book – where we’d open the door and dozens of long-legged friends would leap out and take over our house, lounging on the couch and cooking themselves shoo-fly pie. but really, that’s impossible. i keep the doors shut so if that was true, we’d have lots of little ribbets trapped in the bathroom. maybe the sliding door upstairs? hmm, but it’s never open. the whole ordeal was really intriguing, but it didn’t really bother me. i’d much rather have an influx of frogs than cockroaches.

and then came a haunting discovery. and this is where my opinion of the matter takes a 180 turn. it still make me cringe when i think of it. (actually, my phone just went off and i jumped, that’s how squeamish i am about it). we found a frog graveyard. 5 frogs. dried up. very dead. one…beheaded. in the tracks of our screen porch door off the living room. i open and close that door probably 5 times a day – i was absolutely an accessory to this crime.

they must be coming through the screen door. we were all so creeped out that i don’t think anyone opened that door for a week or so. if we didn’t open the door, then no frogs could leap through, right?

wrong.

last friday saagar was climbing in the brac. i was flying to miami in the morning so i got some takeout sushi, poured a glass of wine and cozied up on the couch. and then i saw a flash of something dark out of the corner of my eye. there he was, hopping UP THE STAIRS (probably headed for our room this time, that bastard!). saagar is the frog catcher, not me. girls are not built to catch frogs! i was able to make it turn around and come back downstairs, but after chasing it around with a bowl…seriously, what do you use to catch frogs indoors?…i came up empty handed. after seeing it crawl up the wall from behind the couch i was too afraid to sit down and enjoy my dinner so i closed all the doors, warned the roommate about the frog, and went to bed.

the next morning, we regrouped and she mentioned she did see a frog when she came home from the bars. i looked behind the couch and didn’t see anything – then we saw one near the edge of the carpet. a DIFFERENT one than i chased the night before (don’t tell me you think all frogs look the same, you’re so frogcist). we decided on a plastic bag approach…kind of pick up the frog they way you pick up dog poop. i was still cursing saagar and the ill timing of our trips. i caught the frog in the bag and THREW it across the yard. i am an independent woman!!

so that’s the last frog i’ve seen…but i know that other guy must be around here somewhere. i wish this story had an end…but the only place it really ends is the frog graveyard *shudder*

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